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      <image:title>Blog - I love you. - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - I saw some flowers today - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - I will not be dictated to! I am in charge!</image:title>
      <image:caption>Me: I will not be dictated to by two three-year-old boys! I am in charge! Also me: - Wears twice the amount of moisturiser I need to so they can both have a turn handing me the pot - Says ‘“Yeah, a bus!” about 7 times every time we see one (bear in mind we live in London) until I get the volume, intonation, and enthusiasm live just right - Takes my glasses off because they tell me to - Sits on one measly cushion, staring longingly at all my other cushions that I am not allowed to have - Agrees to call peanut butter “jam”, French toast “bread toast”, grey “white”, scarecrows “rare ghosts”, and my beige cardigan “curtains” - Has to knock on my own door, go inside and shut it and then go back out again every time I come home - Acknowledges that biscuits are not, in fact, treats,  - Retraces fifteen minutes’ worth of steps around the shopping centre because I went in the wrong door (silly me!)</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>9th March 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, I still miss you. I really do. But something happened today that I've been wishing for for a long time. I woke up, and I didn't have to look after anyone but myself. I didn't have to clean up poo or rush around getting breakfast ready while you both shout at me to hurry up. No one bit me or tried to pull my teeth or my eyes out. I just read the paper and drank a coffee, went to the gym, and then just drove myself to the shops without having to take nappies or snacks or plan where to feed you at midday. And it was lovely. And then I walked past the Build-a-Bear shop and thought how nice it would be if you were with me and we could build some bears together. And then I saw lots of parents pulling their kids around in these fun trucks and I thought how much you would love that, and I felt a bit sad and lonely. But then I reminded myself that I spend 99% of my time with you, and that I'd really been looking forward to having some time to myself, so I vowed to make the most of it. Because even if you love someone with every cell of your body, it's OK to want to do something without them occasionally. It doesn’t mean you love them any less. The only reason I can enjoy that time without you is because I know it's not forever. Because next Saturday I'll be with you, trying to get the banana pancakes to cool fast enough to stop you shouting and banging the table. Not reading the paper and not really minding because I did that last week, and it turns out playing with you two and pretending to be the tickle monster and letting your pudgy little hands poke and prod my face is actually way more fun. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>6th March 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, I miss you. I've seen you on my iPad screen every morning and travelled through time and across the ocean to watch you eat your tea (and throw the bits that you don't want to eat on the floor). And I've seen photos of you enjoying yourselves with your Grandma and Granda, and smiled back at your cheeky smiles, but it's just not the same as seeing them in real life. When I see pictures of you I can almost feel the weight of you in my arms and your soft, cool little cheeks brushing against mine. Almost, but not quite. So I can't wait to see you and cuddle you for real. Not all that excited to resume my role as Chief Pasta Picker Upper, though. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>5th March 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, " It must be hard being away from them. You must miss them terribly." Someone said this to me, and it's true. It is. And I do. When I booked this trip in January it was fine because it was ages away. But now it's here and it's the longest I’ve ever been away from you. Nine whole nights! I think about you a lot and wonder what you're doing. I wonder if you miss me as much as I miss you (I'm pretty sure that you don't). I look forward to FaceTiming you at 9 am every morning (my time), and I look forward even more to coming home and seeing you. But I don't think about you all the time. And even though I'm here for work and I've got lots to do, it feels nice to have some time to myself. It feels like a bit of a break. And I'm a bit scared to say that out loud in case it sounds like I don't love you enough. Like I don't want to spend all my time with you. But I love you more than I know what to do with. And I do want to spend all my time with you. I want to spend every minute of every day with you. It's just I'd like a few extra minutes to spend on my own. X X X</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-20</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>4th March 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, Keith Flint died today. His music with The Prodigy is the soundtrack to so many memories for me and your dad. The first time I ever heard them was when I was with my mam and dad at their friend Kay's house, and her son Jeffrey played Firestarter on a cassette. I wasn't sure what I thought - I'd never heard anything like it - but I said I liked it to sound cool. Then I saw the video on Top of the pops, and mam and dad said it was awful, so I said I didn't like it (I did). Then eight years later I heard it live for the first time with your dad at the Metro club in Melbourne and got so close to Keith Flint (I feel like he's one of those people whose names you have to say in full each time) that some of his sweat sprayed onto my face. It was amazing. Since then we've seen them at V Festival, Glastonbury, Newcastle, Brixton - all over! I always thought we'd see them again. I'm sosad we won't. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>1st March 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, Our babysitter Jayne was concerned about you today, Finn. She thought you had an ear infection because you kept putting your hands over your ears. I had to explain that you were just playing " Where's Finn? ' and you think we can’t see you when your hands are on your ears. When you first started playing the game you used to put your hands over your eyes, thinking (quite logically) that if you couldn't see us, we couldn't see you. But as time's gone on you've put less and less effort in while we play on with the same enthusiasm. You must think we're idiots. We are! XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Reasons I used to be late vs reasons I'm late now</image:title>
      <image:caption>Reasons I used to be late: - Got in the shower when it was time to leave - Couldn't get my hair quite right - Couldn't decide between the pink top and the sparkly one - Had to change out of jeans because I couldn't breathe in them - Which earrings? Which shoes? - Decided the sparkly top was a bit much Reasons I'm late now: - Takes an hour to get the boys to agree to have breakfast and another two for them to eat it - They must watch Toy Story 3 in its entirety before they can start the day - One of them only likes blue socks, and we only have 2.5 pairs in the whole house - Sometimes they don't like the way I take their coats down from the peg - Have to change out of jeans because they're covered in snot - Hide in toilet for a bit wondering whetheroo it's really worth ever leaving the house again - Have to spend time explaining to my two-year-old son why it’s not safe for him to drive</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-20</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>25th February 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, We walked to the park this afternoon (well, I did, you two just sat back and enjoyed the view and moaned at me whenever I slowed down — you're pretty heavy now FYI). I pushed you both on the swings and you squealed and giggled and had that look on your faces like you can't believe the swings were free because surely if people knew how amazing they were they’d be on them all the time, so you try and hold in your glee so that other people don't catch on and you get to keep swinging forever. Except you can't swing forever, and when the time came to lift you out and put you in your pushchair to go home, you cried and looked at me like I was the meanest person in the whole wide world. And I felt terrible. (Nor terrible enough to let you keep swinging though.) If you could talk, you'd have said you wanted to stay on the swings and asked why we had to leave. And I’d have said something very boring and adult like 'Well it would be lovely to just swing on swings all day but sadly life doesn't work like that and we need to get home so you can throw food all over the floor for half an hour sorry I mean eat your tea and go to bed.’ And then we'd have entered into a negotiation and you'd have won an extra 3 minutes and 47 seconds of swing time because I am weak. But you can't talk yet, so I am making the most of being able to just put you back in your pushchair and take you home without an argument. As always, you have got me thinking about why we can't just swing on swings all day. And when you're 47 and I feel ok about leaving you in the park by yourself, you're welcome to do that if you want. Although you probably won't, because you'll have discovered lots of other things you enjoy by then. And it is important to spend time doing the things you enjoy and not always worry about getting home in time for tea. But if everyone just swang on swings all day, who would make the swings? XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>23rd February 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, It was our friend Alfie's first birthday party today! You went straight for the washing machine because you already know that that all the cool people hang out in the kitchen at parties. Then you took a bite out of few sausage rolls and tried to go up the stairs about twenty times, and then we had to leave because your dad had to go to work. He dropped us off at Battersea Park. I got a bit frustrated while we were there because it was really busy and I just felt like I couldn't move without being in someone's way (a common feeling with a double buggy). But then on the way home a man was cycling towards us absolutely beaming, and he just shouted " LOVELY " at you both and it so was. xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>22nd February 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's the first day this year we haven't needed our coats, which always makes me feel good. It makes the day so much easier to move through. Makes my bones feel lighter and my arms swing easier. Also this first-day-without-a-coat is earlier than I ever remember it being. And as I'm writing this i'm thinking about you reading it 50 years from now after a climate disaster, completely aghast that I ever thought it was ok to laugh about not needing a coat in February. We went to the park so we could meet your dad on his way home from work, which is the highlight of my day at the moment. Your dad snuck up behind behind you while you were on the swings like he always does, and I love to watch your little faces as you try to work out how he got here. You're always so delighted. X X X</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-20</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>20th February 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, You both woke up screaming at 2.45am, not feeling well after your vaccinations. And while I'm sorry you were feeling bad, I was honestly thrilled at the chance to comfort you. Your dad and I took you into our bed and sang The Wheels on the Bus complete with lions, dinosaurs and dragons (roars are your favourite thing right now), and being able to cheer you up and make you laugh and see you look up at us with your tiny tear-streaked faces and shiny eyes was very, very special. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>13th February 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's 11.49pm and I just went to put something in your room. I didn't have to do it now, but I wanted to see you breathing. I wanted to watch your chests rise and fall and see the curve of your noses and your little lips sticking out. And now I'm lying in bed trying to make sure I never ever forget this wonderful feeling of sharing a life and a space with you both. And wondering if I appreciate you enough and whether I'm enjoying this enough and whether you're getting the best of me. I'm trying my best. I hope it shows. xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>4th February 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's your dad's birthday today, so we did exactly what he wanted to do, which is not get dressed up and not go out. So we had pizza and sat on the sofa, and that was just fine by him. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>2nd February 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's ten past midnight, I’ve just finished work, and I'm tired. It's Saturday tomorrow and old me would have probably had a little lie in until 8.30 then pottered about making breakfast and endless cups of tea while reading the magazine bit of the newspaper. But lie-ins don't happen anymore. Nor does pottering, either. Nowadays I just charge to and from the washing machine, showering you all with stray socks as I go. I'm not going to lie and say I don't miss lie-ins and pottering, because I really, really do. But I’m smiling now just thinking about seeing your little faces in the morning. I love hearing you chat to each other in the morning, then walking into your room and seeing you smile up at me through barely open eyes. I love how warm you are when I pick you up to get you ready, and how soft your cheeks feel against mine. I love the sound of your snuffling and burbling and watching you come to life and get ready for another day of discovery. I'm not so keen on the contents of your nappy or the way you pull my hair and grab my cheeks. And having to chase you around the bedroom to put your trousers on can be a little tiresome. But all things considered, it's a pretty great way to start the day. Just try not to throw too much porridge around tomorrow, ok? XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>21st January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's my birthday today! I'm 34 years old. It feels important to tell you that I guess because the age of my parents felt so important when I was younger. Mam was 39 when she had me and dad was 41, which made them the oldest parents at my school by quite a stretch. I suspected my friend's parents were a similar age, but when I asked her to find out she came back the next day and said they were both 24. We got dressed up and went for a fancy meal tonight (well I got dressed up, your dad just moaned about having to wear proper shoes) and it was lovely. It was exactly what I wanted to do, which is exactly what should happen on your birthday. x x x</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>20th January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, You are one! We took you to Franco Manca for tea wearing old-man checky shirts that were at least a size too big, like the ones the lads used to wear on nights out when I was 15. You sucked the topping off each slice of pizza before chucking the rest on the floor, and had your first ever apple juice, ice cream, and cake. We sang Happy Birthday to you both, which you seemed to enjoy, and reflected on the most amazing year of our lives. My previous most amazing year was 2012, when I held a piece of a fibreglass replica of John Lennon's face in the London 2012 Olympic closing ceremony. And after that it was 2014, when your dad and I got married. Your dad can't remember what his favourite years were, but a few days after you were born I asked him if he was happy and he said it was the best thing he’d ever done after marrying me (not that he really did much). So thank you for being here. Thank you for teaching me to look at the world more closely, and to find joy in smaller things. And also to be present in the moment rather than always thinking of the next thing, because I don't want to miss a bit of you. I love you. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>19th January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, We had a little party for your first birthday today. Unfortunately most of your little friends were ill and couldn't come, but it was lovely nonetheless. I spent a very long time icing a cake that looked distinctly amateur (shout out to the disgruntled fondant duck) and making a balloon rainbow from a kit that was fundamentally flawed, but I wouldn't have it any other way. You wore personalised coordinating loungewear, I wore a sparkly leopard print jumper, your dad wore a polo shirt, as always. We all ate egg mayo sandwiches, cheesy puffs, and Rice Krispie cakes. And at the end of a lovely day, you drank your milk on the living room floor while me and my friends drank prosecco and took selfies with you. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>17th January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, I've been wanting to write and create some things for a while, but other stuff keeps getting in the way. So one of my aims for this year is to make time for the things I really want to do. I don't have time to do much outside of work and being with you, but it there's something that's really important to me — something I feel like I need to do in order to feel like me, then I'm going to make it happen. I'm going to ask myself what things I'd regret not doing if I died tomorrow (morbid but effective). When I worked at innocent, the founders Rich, Adam and Jon used to talk about the ' Eastenders test’. They said that if you were really serious about setting up your own business, then you had to want to work on that in the evenings, instead of watching Eastenders (or Real Housewives in my case, although the joy of Real Housewives is that you can have it on in the background while you work on your other dreams and not really miss much). Some other great advice is that if you want do something, instead of thinking about how much you want to do it and feeling sad that you don’t have the time, you should just start doing it. Even if you only get to do a tiny bit. Just start. Don't think about all the things in your way and how hard it's going to be. Get cracking, and work all that out as you go. The important thing is to start, and keep going. Xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>16th January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, You both just smiled at me and then I smiled back. And then I wondered if I’d actually smiled first, and you'd smiled back. But it doesn't matter who started it. when you put joy out into the world, you get joy back. xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>14th January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, You just waved at us! You were sitting in the bath and when you looked up at me and your dad you both started waving, and we felt the most wonderful jolt of excitement between us. It's so special when that happens - when you get to feel the joy of an extraordinary feeling, and then the extra joy of knowing that someone you love felt the exact same thing at the exact same time. Xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>13th January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, We got home today from a lovely weekend in Southwold with our friends Heli and Mark. Your dad and I met Heli years ago when we went to V Festival with our other friends Annabel and Craig, who’d persuaded your dad to buy the tickets at around four times face value from a resale site when we had a party at his mam and dad's house while they were away. It turned out to be one of the best decisions he's ever made - we had years of fun at that festival with so many friends. We spent Saturday afternoon drinking champagne and talking fast and loud like you do when you haven't seen people ..love for a while. You want to fill each other in on the essentials, but you know you don't have to say everything that's happened since you last saw each other. You can just pick up and carry on in the present, and fill in the gaps when you need to. You two were thrilled at the change in surroundings and all the open space and spent the whole time crawling round and round the kitchen table and up and down the hallway. You were also enchanted by the dogs, Meg and Kosmo, and did everything you could to make them love you. In the evening Mark served us up his famous beer and Guinness stew. We've loved it in the past but sadly this time he'd made it with gone-off suet and it tasted a little rancid. It turned out to be a great test of the limits of politeness, anyway. Heli piped up straight away and told him it was absolutely vile. I kept mumbling that it wasn't so bad really and ate about a third of it. And your dad insisted it was absolutely delicious and ate the whole thing (which worringly I think is more a reflection on his taste buds than his manners). Before we left today we had a bracing walk on the beach and the most delicious fish and chips at the Sole Bay Fish company. I was a bit worried about eating in but far from making the other diners hate us, you actually managed to charm them! Thanks lads. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>6th January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, I'm really sorry I just got annoyed with you. It's just I spent quite a bit of time this morning making falatel for you when I could have been watching Luther, so watching you squish them mischievously under your pudgy little palms then fling them on the floor made me a little upset. It wouldn't have been so bad, but in an effort to be organised last night I made and froze a few omelettes which are your second favourite food in the world ever. Except apparently they're not, anymore. Still you seem to love the muffins l accidentally cooked for twenty minutes too long until they were dry as the desert. Fingers crossed you still like fish fingers. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>6th January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, One thing I wasn't really prepared for is how hard it is to do things with you. Obviously I knew I wouldn't be going to fancy restaurants and bars, and I knew that just getting out the house would be hard because of all the things we'd have to do to get ready. But I didn't think about precisely how many individual tasks would be involved, and how uniquely challenging each one would be, and what it would feel like to do every single one of those tasks twice, for two uniquely challenging individuals. I wrote a little guide to going to the park today, just so I could remember it. How to take the kids to the park: 1. Wrestle them into coats and hats, put them somewhere safe, and put on your coat 2. Open front door, go back for pushchair and carry it through the hall, taking care not to gouge holes in the walls or whack the kids round the head as you go 3. Run down steps with pushchair and erect it 4. Go back for one child, reassuring the other one that you're not leaving them alone forever 5. Carry first child down steps and put in pushchair 6. Repeat for child two 7. Go back and lock door 8. Realise you've forgotten your phone/water/changing bag/soul 9. WHY DID YOU PUT YOUR COAT ON YOU’RE ON FIRE 10. It's actually pretty dark now 11. Go to bed?</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>3rd January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, We’re driving home soon. Gran Jan says she’s going to miss us very much. I’m really going to miss her too. We’ve been staying at a holiday cottage two doors down from her and grandad, and it’s so nice to be able to pop in and see each other. That’s one thing I really miss — where we live we don’t have any friends or family nearby to just pop in and see, or who can pop in and see us. We have to plan things weeks in advance and then reschedule a few times before we see each other. Whenever it’s time to go home, I find myself wishing we could start the visit all over again — so I could enjoy the time with the people I love all over again, but also so I could appreciate it more, and snap and snipe less. So I could be my best self the whole time and not waste a single second of this precious time. The time I wish for so hard when I'm not with my family, but which never runs quite as smoothly when I'm with them as it did in my head when I wished for it. But I try not to think like that too much. We had a lovely time, we all love each other, and we understand that we can't all be on top form all of the time, not even you two. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>2nd January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, I was putting my pyjamas on tonight and your sock was caught in the leg, which reminded me of one of my most embarrassing moments ever, when I was walking down the street and yesterday's pants fell out of my trouser leg and onto the pavement. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>1st January 2019 Dear Cooper and Finn, I went to bed at 11.11pm last night. I felt a bit lame and like I'd let myself down by not making it to midnight on New Year's Eve, but then I remembered I don't really care and made the most of the extra 49 minutes of sleep. This year I want to cram less in to our days. To be present in the moment and not always thinking of the next thing. And to not just see things as tasks to be ticked off. Oh and to stop getting quite so ratty at your dad. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>30th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, We've been at home in Weardale for a few days now, and it's been lovely. We had Christmas Day number 2 with gran Jan and grandad George on Friday, and we all wore paper Christmas hats and watched you wipe food around your mouths before throwing it on the floor. Then you opened your presents - some great ones, like the musical instruments and the toy cars- and some not quite so great ones, like the whale shape sorter and an assortment of other odd gifts from the £5 shop that looked like bargains on the surface, but once opened revealed fundamental design flaws. Like the fake Tamagotchi I got from Penrith market when I was twelve, which died on day 7 every time, no matter what. Then on Sunday we had our third Christmas Day of the year with grandma Hazel and granda Geoff, and aunty Gemma, uncle Alan, and cousin Freya. We had the full works all over again, and it was chaos in the best way, because we were all so grateful to have ach other there. It was also pretty stressful - you can be grateful for something and get annoyed by it at the same time. That's just life. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>26th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's Boxing Day! Another of my favourite days of the year. A day for lying on the sofa, watching comfort TV, and eating chocolates and leftover sandwiches. We watched the Snowman and The Snowdog and I cried like I do every year. Then we packed our stuff to take home tomorrow. I can't wait to see everyone, but I could have done without having to pack today. Sometimes it feels like I spend my whole life getting ready for the next thing. I'd like to try and enjoy the moment a little longer. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>25th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's here, your first Christmas! We all wore our festive jumpers, and by some Christmas miracle, all the baubles on the tree remained intact. We had a quiet day, but it was most definitely not chilled. No day ever is now you two are here. Although we really missed seeing family and friends, it felt really nice not to spend the day driving round and visiting everyone, never really able to relax because we're always thinking about where we need to be next. We gave you a ride-on tiger and ladybird, a telephone with eyes on wheels, and a dancing robot called Beatbo. Then we popped round to our neighbours’ house for a couple of glasses of prosecco and left once you'd knocked one over each. Dinner was at about 4pm, after your second nap of the day. We had roast turkey, pigs in blankets, mashed potato, roast potato, cauliflower cheese, mashed turnip, carrots, broccoli, stuffing balls, mint sauce, and lingonberry jam. We thought you'd eaten loods but then we found it all under the table afterwards. Then we watched Arthur Christmas, put you in the bath and to bed, and your dad and I flopped on the sofa, wondering where the day had gone and why we were so tired. xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>24th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's Christmas Eve! One of my favourite days of the year. I think I like it even more than Christmas Day. For me it's a day without pressure. A day of quiet anticipation before the big day. A day of looking forward to something, which is an incredibly enjoyable experience in itself. I haven't worked on Christmas Eve for a few years now, but I have done many times. First at the chip shop in Frosterley. Then at the Centre for Life in Newcastle where someone once told me I'd ruined Christmas for his 8-year-old daughter because we had to tell people who tried to join the queue when we were close to closing that they wouldn't be able to go ice skating. And one year when I was working from home at mam and dad's house as a People's Champion for innocent smoothies, an angry customer phoned me at 4.03pm and demanded that I trudge to the postbox through the snow to post her some smoothie vouchers. But not today, thankfully. I'm just sitting at home, enjoying the day with you and your dad, thinking about what to watch and eat next. If I was seventeen again again, I'd be getting ready to go out down Crook tonight, wearing a dress and no coat even in the snow. I’d jump around and shout along to All I want for Christmas is you, have a few Taboo and lemonades, and get chips, cheese and garlic sauce before click-clacking across the cobbles in my silver satin kitten heels across the cobbles to dad's car. (Thanks dad.) xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>20th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, Here are some of the things I love about you. I love how you shout incoherent babble at us with such conviction, like you’d be shocked to discover we have no idea what you're saying. I love how your faces light up when you see something you've never seen before and you try to work out what it is. I love the ‘thud thud thud’ sound you make as you crawl around, and how you come to the door and pause while you look around to see where the action is, and then head straight for it. I love how when I come into your room in the morning and after your naps you're both standing up, smiling, ready to go again. I also really love it when you're asleep. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>17th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I'm so excited for Christmas now. It'll be the first time we've ever spent Christmas Day at home, just the four of us, and I can't wait to start our own traditions. And by that I mean force you to do all the things I want to do and eat the things I want to eat, and if you try to resist say "but it's Christmas” with sad eyes. I used to love it when we got the Christmas food in the house. Food we never had at any other time of the year. There’d be a twelve-pack of Pepsi, a pretzel snack tray, Bombay mix, Shloer, honey roasted cashews, Twiglets, satsumas, mince pies, Celebrations, After Eights, and Chocolate Orange. I'd wake up to a pillowcase of presents from Santa, then we’d take it in turns to open the presents from under the tree, then dad and I would stuff our faces with chocolate and Twiglets and mince pies as mam repeatedly told us to stop eating because we'd spoil our our dinner (she was right). We'd watch Carols from Kings, The Snowman, and the Top of the Pops Christmas special, and I'd record the best films on the brand new videotapes dad's friend Sandy always bought me. I hope you love Christmas Day as much as I do. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>16th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I've just got home from Christmas lunch with my friends, and my belly and my heart are full. We call ourselves Belfast because years ago we set up a WhatsApp group to arrange a trip to Belfast that I didn't end up going on. It was such a lovely afternoon. We ate delicious bread, dips, barbecued meat and chips, drank champagne and wine, and sang Christmas songs from printed sheets. It was the kind of afternoon you wish you could have every week, but you know you wouldn't enjoy as much if you did. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>14th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I’m on my way home! Every time I think about seeing your little faces and squeezing and squeezing squeezing you and kissing and kissing and kissing you I get a little bit giddy. Looking at photos of you on my phone and smiling to myself will have to do until I get to see the real thing. Can't wait! Apologies in advance for the onslaught of love you're about to receive! I've got a whole week's worth to let out. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>9th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I've just landed in San Jose, California. It's 11:49 pm your time. It's crazy that it's still the same day and I'm halfway around the world. I miss you! I'm just remembering what you feel like in my arms. I know the exact weight. The exact warmth. The exact softness. I know how you breathe and how your heart beats and how you burble away at nothing in particular. Just thinking about all this is making me smile. See you soon, lads. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>5th December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, It's been so lovely to wander around in short sleeves in December. When it's sunny and warm enough to not have to wear a coat, there's one less thing weighing me down. Movements feel easier, freer. And somehow thoughts do too. I was talking to your dad about whether he’d like to live somewhere that's warm in the winter, but he says he likes the winters we have at home. I do too. I love the crisp, fresh, clear days that feel so bright and sharp that it comes as a shock. And I love how it feels inside when it's gloomy and miserable outside. I like the seasons. I like change. xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - In between</image:title>
      <image:caption>When my world shrank So did my wants And all the things I’d hoped we’d do Got crumpled up And put to one side Until later Or never Who knows And what was left was smaller All the little things in between Glances Touches Ways of saying things The type of stuff You can’t book online Now I just want to pop round Push the door Shout hello Step inside Hear your voice brighten See your face light up Lock eyes as you get up from your chair “Cup of tea?” you’ll say Straight away “Ooh yeah, but I’ll do it, you sit down” I’ll see the crinkles in your face Smile and rub your hand Always soft Always cold Just like mine Then we’ll just sit And be for a while Nothing to say or do Enjoy the same air On the same bit of earth Everything better Because we’re both there</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Naptime optimism</image:title>
      <image:caption>What I think I’m going to achieve during naptime: - Eat a nutritious lunch - An entire day’s work - All the chores - All the admin - Exercise - Read some of my book - Maybe even write some of my book! What I actually do during naptime: - Have the wee I’ve needed all morning - Eat half-chewed toast slumped against the Kitchen counter, processing the trauma of the day so far - Realise I don’t have time for anything else - Move everything from today’s to-do list onto tomorrow’s because tomorrow I will have my shit together</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - To do during a global pandemic</image:title>
      <image:caption>TO DO - Check in on family, friends and neighbours - Help people out in whatever way I can - Support local and small businesses where I can - Try not to lose my shit at the kids and say things like “you’d better flipping eat that sandwich, don't you realise we're in the middle of a global pandemic?!!” - Write a book - Landscape the garden - Realise I don’t actually have any extra free time, remember how lucky I am to have a job I can do from home, people I love to spend time with, and a messy garden - STAY THE F*%K AT HOME - Learn to cut and colour hair. Quickly.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - It’s extraordinary really</image:title>
      <image:caption>It’s extraordinary really How we all carry on When our hearts are breaking Our lives are crumbling When so much is going wrong But still we keep on going Leave our beds, go to work, make small talk We find pockets of joy And laugh with the tears Because life can be both light and dark You think we’d be quicker to realise Considering all we’ve been through That when people are a bit weird or rude It’s because they’re struggling too Or maybe they’re just massive dickheads Doing their usual dickish things But if we don’t know for sure We could choose to be kind Because kindness always wins Except it doesn’t really though, does it? It’s not as simple as that But it’s a good place to start It feels good to be kind Because it spreads, it grows, it comes back</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-20</lastmod>
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      <image:caption>3rd December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, While we were queving at the post office today I saw a box full of leather effect pocket diaries on the counter. And it made me a bit sad that they probably won’t sell many. That one day no one will buy them anymore and they’ll stop making them. They were just like my gran used to buy and my mam still buys now. Whenever I tell her what dates we’ll be visiting she writes them straight down in there so she knows not to make any appointments at the same time, because she wants to see us as much as possible. I don’t want her to ever not do that. X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>2nd December 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, One of you made a noise just as I was about to go to sleep and I was thrilled at the excuse to go into your room and look at you again. You sleep well most of the time (thank you) so sometimes when you do wake in the night and I get to spend extra time with you while the rest of the world sleeps, it feels like the most special, secret joy. Other times I feel so exhausted I feel physically sick. But sometimes it really is the most wonderful treat. Xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>27th November 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, What a lovely day out! Probably the first one we’ve had that I wouldn’t describe as nice but chaotic, or nice but stressful. It was just nice. It was nice even though our arms ached from carrying you round the aquarium so you could smile at all the creatures. It was nice even though we ate our hot dogs dodging rain drips under a bridge because we’re still too scared to take you in restaurants. It was nice despite and because of all of those things. XXX</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-20</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>23rd November 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I slipped over on a spilt drink in Liverpool last week when we were celebrating our friend Chrissy’s 40th birthday. I didn’t think it was broken because they told me it wasn't at the hospital, and the pain felt similar to the time I slipped over on a (very slippy) zebra crossing in Magaluf when celebrating our friend Jemma’s hen do and overtensed the ligaments in my arm. Anyway, it turns out it is actually fractured. I got a letter from the hospital today apologising for missing it on the x-ray, and as soon as I read it my arm suddenly felt a lot more painful. I had to go to A&amp;E to get checked out again and the doctor told me I need to rest it for four weeks! Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Xxx</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>15th November 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, You had your first ride in a trolley today! I used to love going to the supermarket when I was little. We’d start off in the pasta aisle (or maybe we didn’t, but that’s the first bit I remember) and I’d pick up a packet of tricolore spaceship pasta. I was inconsolable when they stopped making it! Then we’d get a lovely big fresh white baguette and mam and dad let me tear off a chunk to keep me quiet on the way round, then I’d wash it down with a carton from our six-pack of tropical juice that I’d still be slurping on when we went through the checkout. X X</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>14th November 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I thought nothing could beat your perfect gummy toothless smiles but now you’ve both got two perfect little stumpy teeth right in the middle of your mouth at the top, and another two at the bottom directly below them, and it’s the best thing I ' ve ever seen. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>13th November 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I had no idea how much joy I’d get from seeing you do things for the first first time. You just suddenly started clapping in the car, and when I spotted you in the mirror I was so giddy with excitement I genuinely considered pulling over and flagging down some cars so they could come and have a look and feel what I was feeling. In the middle of the Al motorway. I didn’t of course. I just carried on driving and thought about how lucky I was to have seen it myself. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>9th November 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, You're almost ten months old now, and I’ve been back at work for almost six. I'm very lucky that I work from home and I do a lot of work in the evenings, so I get to spend way more time with you than other people who work full time get to spend with their kids. I’ve got a job I love, and I still get to look after you. I‘ve got it all! It’s intense though. To cram it all in I can’t afford to waste a single moment of the day. I flick the kettle on to boil and run upstairs with the clean washing. I cook the next day’s meal while you’re eating your tea. I hoover under the sofas while you’re crawling about on the floor. I write things for work in my head while I’m busy doing other things, and repeat them over and over until I get chance to write them down. It’s exhausting, but it's my choice to do it like this. For me it’s worth it, and for the most part I enjoy it. It’s not possible to completely understand why someone makes the choices they do, because you can never fully understand what it’s like to be them. You don’t have exactly the same experiences that they do, and even if you did, you wouldn’t experience them in the exact same way. so rather than worrying too much about what other people are doing and why, you have to try and trust that they’re doing the right thing for them in the circumstances. And if they’re not, hopefully they’ll work it out for themselves in the end. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>5th November 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I’ve just watched Season 2 Episode 4 of The Wire (not for you until you’re over 21), and I laughed when Nick said dinner was tuna surprise. When I was younger my mam would make 'lentil surprise' for tea, only she pronounced it 'surpreese’ to make it sound more exotic and exciting. Dad and I groaned when she told us what we were having, because it was the least exciting meal ever. It's only now I understand that she was trying to make the most of not a lot. I’ll be forever grateful for that. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Blog - Dear Cooper and Finn</image:title>
      <image:caption>3rd November 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, We met baby Georgie today! She weighed almost nothing and fell asleep on me after about 3 minutes, and you two slid around the floor trying to pull things off the shelves. I thought you were still small, but all of a sudden I could see how much you’d grown. I used to think that when people marvelled at how much kids had grown that it was just small talk, something to fill the air with. Now I understand it’s because they really are amazed. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>31st October 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, After a full-on morning getting us all ready to leave the house, I arrived at Cannon Street Station a little peckish. I‘ll pop into M&amp;S and grab a sandwich, I thought. It sounds so easy when I say it like that. Only M&amp;S is crowded and cramped, and your buggy is pretty big, so I struggled to even get close enough to the sandwiches to pick one. After being showered with tuts and sighs by people who clearly thought they were more entitled to a sandwich than me, I eventually got my hands on a prawn mayonnaise. Level 1 complete. Now I just had to make it through the queue. It looked tricky, and I considered trying to quickly dash through it alone, but I thought it would be frowned upon if I left you behind the Percy Pigs rack. We got down the first leg of the queue OK, but the turn was too tight for us so I had to reverse out to the sound of more tuts and sighs and abandon the sandwich I’d fought so hard to get amidst the flapjacks and brownie bars. Then I flounced out in tears, and pushed you down a step forwards because it suited my flounce better than turning round and going down it backwards sensibly, almost tipping you out in the process. Reading this back now I should have just asked someone for help. It would have been nice if someone offered too. I’ll be more inclined to do both in future. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>30th October 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, Deciding to have fish and chips is one of my favourite things about having fish and chips. It’s not so much the act of eating them that I love so much (although that is very nice), but more the build-up. I love when the idea to have it first strikes, just as you’re thinking you can’t be bothered to cook tea. Then you bat it away quickly you should stick to the plan and cook something nutritious! But fish and chips would be so nice, and then you wouldn’t have to cook. You float the idea past someone else and their eyes light up. It’s decided, you’re doing it. Someone goes off to get them, and whoever stays behind gets everything ready. Out comes the salt, vinegar and ketchup (even though they’ll already have salt and vinegar on). Into the oven go the plates (you’ve gotta warm the plates!). And then onto the plates go those delicious warm parcels, ready to unwrap and enjoy. Yum. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>24th october 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, It’s time to go back home. Thank you for the most wonderful time. I don’t think you’ve ever cried so hard or so loud as you have on this holiday. But you‘ve never laughed as hard or as long either. Playing the dummy spitting-out game on our bed together gave me our favourite afternoon ever, and I want to always be able to feel the air vibrate with your glorious giggles and see your eyes shine and your cheeks shake, just as they did that day. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>20th October 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, We're in Mount Washington now. It’s very beautiful and peaceful. I felt so relaxed this afternoon after we’d been for a walk that I asked your dad to go and get us a drink while you napped, even though I knew yould wake up as soon as he brought them over. Which you did. You‘ve changed so much since we’ve been away. You can now open drawers and cupboards, and I spend a lot of time watching you explore, trying to make sure you don’t hurt yourself, and helping you up when you do. Like I’m going to be doing for the foreseeable future, I suppose. If I see you making decisions that I think might end in pain, I can try and use my experience to advise against them, but ultimately it's up to you. I’m not always right. Maybe climbing on that thing won’t end in disaster. But I‘ll be here for you if it does. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>18th October 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, We went up Cadillac mountain this morning to watch the sun rise. It was a bold move, since we had to wake you up at 5.30 am to get up there in time. ‘Never wake a sleeping baby!’ is the first rule random strangers like to dish out unsolicited in the queve at the supermarket, but we‘ve broken that tons of times already when getting you into The Routine (tm) so we weren't worried. Plus (and this is rather petty) we quite enjoy the novelty of waking you up for a change when usually it’s the other way round. And since Cadillac mountain is the first place to view sunrise in the US at this time of year, we were really keen to try and see it. And we made it! We saw the sky going red above the sea as the sun touched it for the first time. Then we decided it was way too cold and windy for you two so we took you back to the car, and by the time I got back to the viewpoint to take some photos there was a massive grey cloud in the way! Nature can be so annoying sometimes. Then we went to Jordan's in Bar Harbor for some of their famous blueberry pancakes. And what a glorious success it was, until we tried to clean some snot off your faces and you let us know rather loudly that you much preferred your pancakes with a side of snot thanks very much. And then we met a lady who is an identical twin and her husband said they were almost completely identical except her sister had a mole on her left breast. LOL · And then he shouted “BOO" at you in a scary voice and made you cry and we left very quickly after that. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>17th October 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, We went for a walk around Jordan pond today. We were looking for beavers but we didn’t have any luck unfortunately. About ten minutes into our walk we realised we’d dropped one of your mittens, Finn, so your dad went back for it and some kind soul had picked it up and put it on a post because that’s what you do when you find a lost glove. X X X</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>16th October 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, We made it to Bar Harbor yesterday. The drive here was lovely – Maine has some very quaint towns. We’ve got to that stage of the holiday where I keep counting how many full days and nights we have left on my fingers, desperate to find some extra time somewhere. We went into Acadia National Park today and did the ship Harbor Walk, where a kind man offered to take our photo. | appreciate it so much when people do that, and I always try and offer too. Afterwards we had a drive up Cadillac Mountain. We could see for miles! But the wind was quite literally taking your breath away so we had to get back in the car. We were going to try and go out for tea as I really wanted a lobster roll, but we thought you might not be up for it. So we got takeaway and enjoyed it once you were asleep instead. Far more sensible. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>14th October 2018 Dear Cooper and Finn, I’m loving being away. All we did was watch TV last night, which is the same as we’d probably have done at home. so you may wonder (along with everyone on our flight over here) why we dragged you half way across the world and made ourselves hoarse singing Old Macdonald just to watch TV on someone else’s sofa. It’s a fair question, and I definitely need to get better at finding this feeling closer to home - but I love how being somewhere different forces you to try new things. Or just to do the same things in different ways. At home we would never eat our breakfast sitting on the kitchen floor in our pants because we have high chairs. But I’m so pleased we did it here. XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>14th October 2018 Dear cooper and Finn, There’s a beautiful hand-drawn map of Orr’s and Bailey Islands hanging on the wall in the cottage we’re renting. It’s by Ronald F. Mowat, and as soon as we walked through the door I fell in love with it. Your dad knew we’d have to try and find a copy before I even did, so I was delighted when we tracked one down at the Land’s End Gift shop (along with some very fetching lobster onesies for you). Later we went for a lovely walk around Otter Brook Preserve, crunching golden leaves under our feet and enjoying the sunshine on our faces. As we drove home you got a little upset again and I was just getting ready to start Old Macdonald when I decided to turn the radio up instead. I did it just as ' To be without you ' by Ryan Adams came on, and it calmed you right down. so I had a lovely three minutes staring out the window, reflecting on the day. Then when we got back we wrapped up warm and went outside to watch the sun go down on our last night on Orr's Island. We listened to the boats creaking and the water slapping and smelled the sea, bathed in golden light. I’ll remember it forever. (You won’t, of course. But trust me, it was awesome.) XXX</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>13th October 2018 Dear cooper and Finn, The road trip begins! Today we drove up to Harpswell from Boston, stopping off for some potato donuts from The Holy Donut on the way (we were going to sit inside and eat them but you made it very clear we should get them to go). We had to keep singing old Macdonald to stop you from crying but I was feeling a little stressed out so I couldn’t think of any animals. Luckily your dad stepped in so I did the verses and he helped out with the animal sounds. We had llamas, geese, camels, zombies and yodellers. It was a lot of fun. We got to our cottage on Orr’s Island just in time to watch the sunset, and it is so beautiful and peaceful. Can’t wait to explore with you tomorrow. XXX</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-23</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
      <image:caption>Me: I will not be dictated to by two three-year-old boys! I am in charge! Also me: - Wears twice the amount of moisturiser I need to so they can both have a turn handing me the pot - Says ‘“Yeah, a bus!” about 7 times every time we see one (bear in mind we live in London) until I get the volume, intonation, and enthusiasm live just right - Takes my glasses off because they tell me to - Sits on one measly cushion, staring longingly at all my other cushions that I am not allowed to have - Agrees to call peanut butter “jam”, French toast “bread toast”, grey “white”, scarecrows “rare ghosts”, and my beige cardigan “curtains” - Has to knock on my own door, go inside and shut it and then go back out again every time I come home - Acknowledges that biscuits are not, in fact, treats,  - Retraces fifteen minutes’ worth of steps around the shopping centre because I went in the wrong door (silly me!)</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
      <image:caption>Me: I will not be dictated to by two three-year-old boys! I am in charge! Also me: - Wears twice the amount of moisturiser I need to so they can both have a turn handing me the pot - Says ‘“Yeah, a bus!” about 7 times every time we see one (bear in mind we live in London) until I get the volume, intonation, and enthusiasm live just right - Takes my glasses off because they tell me to - Sits on one measly cushion, staring longingly at all my other cushions that I am not allowed to have - Agrees to call peanut butter “jam”, French toast “bread toast”, grey “white”, scarecrows “rare ghosts”, and my beige cardigan “curtains” - Has to knock on my own door, go inside and shut it and then go back out again every time I come home - Acknowledges that biscuits are not, in fact, treats,  - Retraces fifteen minutes’ worth of steps around the shopping centre because I went in the wrong door (silly me!)</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5728a8934c2f851f7869e740/1604181120163-I4KRNER9F0KEC4707JKT/Reasons+I%27m+late.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Bits and bobs - Reasons I used to be late vs reasons I'm late now</image:title>
      <image:caption>Reasons I used to be late: - Got in the shower when it was time to leave - Couldn't get my hair quite right - Couldn't decide between the pink top and the sparkly one - Had to change out of jeans because I couldn't breathe in them - Which earrings? Which shoes? - Decided the sparkly top was a bit much Reasons I'm late now: - Takes an hour to get the boys to agree to have breakfast and another two for them to eat it - They must watch Toy Story 3 in its entirety before they can start the day - One of them only likes blue socks, and we only have 2.5 pairs in the whole house - Sometimes they don't like the way I take their coats down from the peg - Have to change out of jeans because they're covered in snot - Hide in toilet for a bit wondering whetheroo it's really worth ever leaving the house again - Have to spend time explaining to my two-year-old son why it’s not safe for him to drive</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:title>Bits and bobs</image:title>
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      <image:caption>It’s extraordinary really How we all carry on When our hearts are breaking Our lives are crumbling When so much is going wrong But still we keep on going Leave our beds, go to work, make small talk We find pockets of joy And laugh with the tears Because life can be both light and dark You think we’d be quicker to realise Considering all we’ve been through That when people are a bit weird or rude It’s because they’re struggling too Or maybe they’re just massive dickheads Doing their usual dickish things But if we don’t know for sure We could choose to be kind Because kindness always wins Except it doesn’t really though, does it? It’s not as simple as that But it’s a good place to start It feels good to be kind Because it spreads, it grows, it comes back</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>When my world shrank So did my wants And all the things I’d hoped we’d do Got crumpled up And put to one side Until later Or never Who knows And what was left was smaller All the little things in between Glances Touches Ways of saying things The type of stuff You can’t book online Now I just want to pop round Push the door Shout hello Step inside Hear your voice brighten See your face light up Lock eyes as you get up from your chair “Cup of tea?” you’ll say Straight away “Ooh yeah, but I’ll do it, you sit down” I’ll see the crinkles in your face Smile and rub your hand Always soft Always cold Just like mine Then we’ll just sit And be for a while Nothing to say or do Enjoy the same air On the same bit of earth Everything better Because we’re both there</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>I saw some flowers today And straight away I thought of you And then I felt sad Not to say "Lovely Howers!" And hear you say 'Lovely flowers! Back too But then I felt a little less sad Because the reason I thought of you Was that we've loved so many flowers together before And so knew You'd love these too</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>Hash browns in the freezer The flash of a dark blue coat A cross-body bag, a Greggs sausage roll Eurythmics on the radio A shirt I would have bought you A perfectly ripe nectarine The shetland theme ture, a gig you would have loved Tin foil over a half-eaten can of beans A woodpecker in the garden Fish and chips by the sea Car sweets in tins, supermarket cafes Cutting onions the way you showed me I could go on and on and on But all there really is to say Is that I thought it would be the big things that got me But it's all the little bits in between And while it's hard Feeling sad A million tiny times a day It's a comfort to know You're so woven into things That you're never too far away</image:caption>
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      <image:caption>I love you. I whisper softly into your cheek As you sleep Grateful for another day Hopeful that tomorrow Brings you back exactly as you are But me better So I can try again To soak up your magic I LOVE YOU. I whisper hard into your head Willing the words Into your skin And your dreams To carry you through not just tonight But the rest of your life My beautiful boy This world is too cruel I'm so scared of what it might do So I send you these words every night To soften your path And stay in your heart Long after I'm gone So you know in your bones How much you are loved</image:caption>
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